Red Bows and Bare Knees
by Shorttail
Summary: The bloodbathed adventure of a girl who has been misguided by someone she loves, and faces a world of darkness and monsters alone as her only task is to keep herself, and the strange yet entrancing girl she has been paired with, alive. Darkness and love.
1. Road

Night. It was a little cold for wearing the dress; my knees felt stiff whenever I stood still for a minute, but I did not regret picking it over my other clothes. They were all rags. I wondered where exactly he had found such a nice dress. It was brand new although there were no markings from any shop. It had a neat smell.

I didn't have any scent of my own. The shampoo he gave me was scentless and there was no perfume either. No, this uniform was lovely. The shoes too were new and shiny. I could conquer the entire world with this. If he'd let me.

He hadn't told me his name, but I figured it wasn't important. Someone else had sent him and I wasn't supposed to know too much.

It was a few hours ago he had awoken me. Awoken me from an endless nightmare. I promised him I'd do anything. I swore my trust and he smiled. A heart warming smile. Then he told me what to do.

It wasn't hard. My job was to wait by the road and take care of the girl no matter what. Take care of her. He touched me as he said it. His hand on my shoulder made me feel light as a feather. I promised to look after her. No matter what.

I let out my hair and tied it up again. I straightened the skirt and pulled up my socks. There weren't any mirrors around. I really wanted to see myself again. He had only let me catch a glimpse in the bucket of water he carried along.

My hands looked way older, but I didn't know about my face. My chest had grown older too and my legs were longer. My hair felt just the same and it was still brown. I just wanted to see my face. I had to know if I was still ugly. I had forgotten to ask him.

There was something shiny in the asphalt. I hadn't noticed it before. It was like it was shining on its own. The darkness wasn't complete, but there were no light sources around to make it shine.

No, this was something special. This was laid out for me to find. But why hadn't he told me before? He had had so much time. More than enough to tell me all the other things. Was this a message? A change of plans?

I took a few steps toward it. My jet black shoes provided a beat in a night that was otherwise soundless. Oh how I missed music. I wasn't allowed to hear it then, but I was at the radio shop ever so often when the people at school...

Anyway, I would go to the store just to listen to music. The shop assistant liked me, I think. She would always pick something new for me to hear. Until mommy found out.

I bend over and reached out. The light fainted and there was nothing there but cold road. Disappointed and with a feeling of being cheated, I turned around and walked back.

The stripes on the road suddenly lit up. I turned and looked into a blinding light. Something was humming. It was a car. I was trapped in the headlight. The brakes screeched. It wasn't enough. Evading.

The light turned away from my eyes and I could see the car. Just as I was about to move I felt locked in place. It wasn't adrenaline. I felt a completely different rush. It wrapped itself around my heart and started pumping it faster. I saw her.

There was a girl on the passenger seat. Not just any girl. It was her. He hasn't told me how she looked, but I was sure she was the right one. I could feel it.

It was too late. I raised my arms and closed my eyes. The howling tires blew away all other sounds. I felt a gust on my bare knees. It was icy. The screeching disappeared and I heard the car crash somewhere behind.

I opened my eyes. I was alone on the road. The girl was gone. I had lost her now, it wasn't too late. I had promised. I spun around and ran to her rescue.


	2. Crash

He had done something to me when he touched my heart. I was in a good shape so unlike before. I could outrun almost everyone in the old days, but now I felt more like I was flying. I wasn't out of breath and I wasn't scared like when I used to run.

Not everything was fine though. I had left the post he gave me and now the girl was in danger. Or maybe... maybe she was hurt.

I felt a lump in my throat. She could be dead. All because of my curiosity. It was my fault. He'd be angry. He saved me and I couldn't even...

I couldn't run anymore. I was out of breath and I had an awful sting. Something was poking my stomach. I couldn't move. Couldn't run anymore. I just couldn't.

Defeated and with no way out, I stumbled over a rock and fell. It hurt. The ground scraped my knees. I lost my breath and stared into the nothingness. My pretty uniform was dirty. Ruined. I shut my eyes.

Howling. Screaming. It came closer. Warning. It was a warning. Something dangerous was about. It kept on. It was howling all around and inside me.

Something cold and wet touched my nose and my eyes flung open. Dawn had already broken. I had been sleeping, but I didn't know for how long. A mist covered the sun and I didn't know what time it was. Or what time I collapsed near the road.

Maybe it wasn't a real morning anyway. No birds were singing and it was snowing. It wasn't supposed to. The flakes melted on my skin and on the ground. I didn't feel its wetness anywhere. It was dead snow. There was nothing in it.

A car had burst through the fence below. Was that the car the girl was in? It looked like it. Or maybe it didn't. I only really saw the headlights. It did look like there was someone in the car though. Something alive.

I got up and looked in all directions. There wasn't anybody around. This had to be the car. She wasn't dead. I started running. Filled with hope, I started moving.

My knees were fine. There were no traces of bruises. My dress hadn't gotten a stain. I'd been sleeping on the ground and I was as clean as ever. The dress still had a neat smell.

The wind. I ran with the wind. Before I knew it I was next to the crashed car. I opened the door to the passenger seat. She turned her head slowly and looked at me. Her mouth was open and her face stiff. I smiled and she stared. She stared. I smiled.

I took her arm gently and helped her out. She wasn't hurt. I couldn't find any wounds. I took her hand and pulled her away from the crash. I asked her what her name was. She looked puzzled.

She was pretty. Middle length black hair and big brown eyes. Beautiful eyes. The kind I always wanted. The way she looked at... I was getting lost. I felt weaker and stronger at the same time. I could protect her from anything. I wanted to.

I straightened her pink pullover and took her hands. She wasn't very tall. She only reached my... my breasts. She looked like she was around six or seven. I was probably twice as old. Maybe a little more. Or less. I had forgotten to ask him.

She said something about her dad. I looked back at the peaceful crash site. Someone else was there. Her dad was sitting inside the car. Unconsciously. Someone else was standing next to him.

A dark figure. It looked at the passenger seat and mumbled something. Then it started scouting the surroundings. I grabbed the girl and dragger her around the corner. I muffled her and peeped out.

The person hadn't seen us. It looked no older than the girl and it was all dressed in black. A shadow seemed to constantly surround it. I narrowed my eyes, trying to see what it was. Then it vanished.

Another person stood next to the car. Older. Much older and definitely a woman. She looked at the quiet man and turned to the empty passenger seat. She was confused. I could feel her utter disbelief.

She was the danger I had to keep the girl away from. She had to be. She said nothing and showed no anger, but deep down I felt a great hate. My cheeks burned. This was my enemy. I squeezed the girl a bit tighter and continued observing.

The woman found something on the empty seat and turned toward us. I retreated. We got up. The girl took my hand and we started running.


	3. Alley

This part of town was unfamiliar. I had probably been here before, but the mist and the snow made it hard. There wasn't anyone around I could ask either. It would have been very lonely if she wasn't tagging along. I held on to her hand a bit harder.

We stopped in front of a house. She sat down and I stared emptily at the door. It looked like all the other doors. There wasn't anybody home. The door was locked.

She mentioned her dad again. Footsteps. Someone was running not far away. I crossed the street and looked down an alley there. It looked safe. It looked like a good place to hide. Someone was around.

I motioned her to follow me. She looked lovely as she stood there and smiled. Weakness and strength overwhelmed me. She started running. I could see someone else in the mist behind her.

The alley was long and we kept on running. It was like there was someone watching us all the time. It wasn't just the one who was after us. There was something else.

The girl caught up with me and we went past a metal gate. The alley got smaller and darker. I took her hand and ran faster. The way was filled with obstacles and she complained. I stopped and listened to her breath and the background noise. Someone was talking somewhere.

She couldn't run anymore. I stroked her hair and smiled. Her eyes. She felt safe. I put my arms under her back and knees and lifted her. She wrapped her arms around my neck. I was strong. I could carry her easily. She felt so light in my arms.

Another door. There was a bag filled with trash blocking the door. I kicked the door open and the bag was emptied on the ground. It was filled with small diaper like packs. They smelled horribly and something seeped out when I stepped on them. I couldn't see exactly what it was because of the darkness.

The scent bothered her. I held her tighter and walked further down the narrow alley. It didn't get any better. More odorous trash filled the ground. It looked like dead animals. Meat waste.

Someone rattled with the door behind us. I put the girl down and pulled up the fence just enough for her to crawl under. She kept the hole open and I squeezed myself through. The fence was spiky, but the dress protected me. It didn't get the slightest scratch.

The remaining light disappeared as the door was opened. Someone moved in the darkness. The girl whimpered and I held on to her. I whispered in her ear and put a finger on her lip.

Beacon. Something light. Our follower held up a weak light and continued down the alley. Slowly. He looked at the animal corpse. The light swayed from side to side. Someone had nailed another corpse to the wall. It was wrapped up in something. It looked like a big dog. I covered her eyes.

Other things filled the alley. Tables and more bags. Everything was colored red. Everything smelled. Smelled like blood. I moved a little backward and pushed her face into my chest to ensure we wouldn't be seen.

It was her dad. I recognized his face as he moved closer. He looked frightened. He was looking for her. Not knowing if he was safe, I decided to continue hiding. He walked past us and into a dead end.

The shadow child was standing behind him. Its clothes were black. I still couldn't see if it was a boy or a girl. The skin had been painted to fit the shadow.

The man turned around and the shadow disappeared again. Someone else... Something moved up the alley. They made strange noises. Frightening noises. His light revealed little black things. Small and fat. Arms and legs. They were missing something.


	4. Monster

They were headless. The bodies looked like small adults except for the long arms and the missing heads. Maybe chimpanzees. The walk was too slow though. And they didn't have claws.

After being cornered and scratched, he panicked. I felt his fear. Running into a locked door only made it worse. I sensed the shadow. It was close and the things kept chasing him.

They hit him. I hid her face and covered her ears, pressed her harder against my chest. They kept on. I watched him fall. I wanted to help him, but I had to protect the girl. He told me I had to safeguard her no matter what. I had to hold her no matter who was dying.

A tear mixed with the bloody ground. A sigh of despair. A breath of the dying. Somewhere, even in the most hopeless of dreams and realities, there's always someone with the power to act. It just wasn't me. It never was. A second tear fell from my cheek. It landed in the girl's hair. I shut my eyes and let the rest float freely.

She resisted and I wouldn't let her go. She resisted and one prepared for the final stab. I cried harder and a determined hero kicked down the door.

She had a torch and a gun. As she let the light fall on the wounded man I could see a blue shirt with a badge. She looked like a cop.

The creatures left the girl's dad alone and turned toward the cop. She kicked one and shot the other. I covered her ears, but it wasn't enough. She was shaking. It was too loud. She shot a few more times. One dropped dead and the other turned around and walked into the darkness.

The cop was strong. And brave. She took the girl's father and threw him over her back. Then she carried him back the way they came. She saved him.

The monster stayed away. I gazed at the dead one. It looked a bit sad, but I didn't feel sorry for it. It was a monster and it was okay to kill it.

Its friend died too. It flew into the fence. The monster took its last breath and rested on the ground. The shadow walked slowly along the fence. It stopped by the monster and whispered something.

Even though the headless creature was dead the shadow wasn't satisfied. It started kicking the corpse. Blood and something that smelled bad oozed out. The shadow child kept kicking.

Without warning the corpse flashed brightly. The shadow, blinded and disorientated, froze completely. Only seconds later the woman was standing behind her. She triumphed and the child dropped to the floor.

She had won. My enemy had defeated the shadow child. Protecting the girl was even more important now. The woman and the child disappeared in a slow flash and left us alone in the alley.

I was about to get up and run when the woman suddenly reappeared. I tightened my grip on the girl and watched in silence. The woman dropped a book and some papers on the floor. Then she disappeared again.

We sat there for a minute. Nobody showed up. No one came around. There was a howling in the distance. It stayed away from my head. I had heard it before. It was there when it turned dark. Suddenly the light returned. Snow flakes melted on my nose.

The girl wasn't well. She looked terrified even though she hadn't seen anything. Perhaps she had been listening to my heartbeats. Maybe she heard the howling too. She definitely heard the shots. I told her not to worry.

Papers lay on the ground. They were mostly empty. The girl picked them all up. She said they were hers. We started walking out the way we came in.


	5. First

It was hers. The sketchbook. It belonged to her. Her dad gave it to her. I had a few books like that one when I was at her age. I spend all my time drawing when I wasn't... when nobody needed me. It took away some of the sadness.

A gust. The girl lay flat on the floor and the papers were scattered. She whimpered breathlessly. I felt her pain. She got onto her elbows and looked up at the bird.

Hovering between walls a little further ahead. It was like something I drew once, but many things were different though. It was ugly. Like a huge bat, but the head and the body were all wrong. It landed on the ground and turned to us.

It screamed and glared at the girl. Pink fabric dropped from its open mouth. I looked at the girl. Her pullover was ripped at the shoulder. She was bleeding. The bird had bitten her.

I called for the girl and the monster gazed at me instead. Its eyes were intimidating. I looked at the ground. The girl had made it back. She was hugging my knee, looking frightened. The monster didn't scare me.

Anger rose within me, warming my face, facets, and fists. I didn't feel angry very often and now the heat spread like a wildfire as if trying to make up for all the silence and covering up. I narrowed my eyes and glared back, clenching my fists even tighter, trying to make a stand.

The monster nodded, accepting the invitation. It spread out its wings and leapt while I pulled my right hand back and prepared to strike. It screamed again and shot toward me and I moved my arm forward with as much force as I could.

My hand stopped in front of me and I opened it, showing the monster my palm. From behind came years of imprisoned rage in its purest form. Without looking I felt the buildings shake and shatter and bricks floating freely through the air.

It embraced us briefly and continued toward the monster, taking the book and scattered papers with it, ripping the alley apart before hitting the pathetic creature dead on and sending its torn body straight through the wall next to it.

Waves of excitement and pleasure ran over me and I smiled at the silent alley where papers and bricks settled down just nicely. I wanted to hurt the thing again, but the feeling of the girl against my leg told me it was enough.

I knelt before her and cupped her cheek. She smiled back. Her shoulder bled in silence. The wound wasn't big, but it needed treatment. A bandage was required. I knew just where to go.

Another brick hit the floor. I looked up to and entire wall tilting. Quickly I pulled her up and started running. The building fell apart and closed the alley behind us.

We soon found ourselves back where we were hiding before. The place was still messy. There was blood everywhere. The girl announced her discomfort and we hurried past it. We climbed the fence and reached the end.

Buildings had fallen apart here as well. It didn't look much like the thing I caused though. I could see the street through a hole near the ground. It was just big enough to crawl through. I looked back over my shoulder before pushing the girl though.

It was the same town outside. It was the same lonely, silent, and unfriendly town. There were houses and probably people in the mist, but to me it was darkness. The silence was threatening. The only thing that kept it from being unbearable was her breathing.

Her heart. The girl's heart. I could hear it. The snow didn't fall straight, but I couldn't hear the wind. Only the sound of her heartbeats. That was the only thing in the world. In our abandoned world.

Music. I longed for music. Her heartbeats, steps, and breathing sounded like a beat. The wind played with her hair and so did I. She looked at me with her big brown eyes. There was a trace of sadness. Or was it really sadness? It could be pain. I glanced at her wound. It still bled. Slowly, but is didn't stop.

The girl would die if she didn't get help soon. The sound of her heartbeats was slowly fading. She needed help. She needed and I was the only one who could give. I had to save her. Somehow.

I recognized a sign. The street's name was written on it. I knew where I was. All I had to do was to get her to a place with a first aid kit. The street was familiar. I knew where to go. I took her hand and we started running.


	6. Aid

Some time ago I was in a cabin. I don't know how long it had been. My memories were fresh. His presence was wonderful. All the time I had been dreaming those dreams... It was all gone. When he was there I forgot all the horrors. He made me want to live. I had never really wanted to live before.

He was gone now. He had other things to do and no time for me. I couldn't call out for him. I didn't know how to, but it wasn't sad. Touching her. Holding her hand. It made up for the loss. I was content with her when he wasn't around.

I didn't know if he'd ever come back. He never said anything about where I was to take the girl. I just had to protect her. It felt strange. Like he somehow knew where we were. Just thinking he was guiding us made me feel safer. There was nothing to be scared of.

More papers were scattered on the road. The girl looked from a distance and we avoided them. He didn't put papers everywhere. It had to be that woman. I knew better than to examine bright things on the road. It was probably the woman who made me make the car crash.

The right road turned up. It was hard to navigate in the mist, but everything seemed more and more familiar. Getting closer to the destination was hard. I felt a lump in my throat just thinking about the place. It was the only place that could help her though. I had no choice. There probably were others, but they were too far away.

Something walked around on the other side of the street. I looked at the girl. There was blood all over her pullover and vest. She sighed and said she couldn't walk any longer. The creature opposite us sniffed a few times. It had caught her scent.

I couldn't attack. Last time I had scattered walls and killed the monster. Yes, its death pleased me. But now I felt nothing. There was no force. I couldn't hurt it like before.

It walked slowly across the road until it spotted us. I wasn't able to kill it, but I could definitely outrun it. I took the girl into my arms. The creature stopped. It looked a little like a dog. The head was wrong though. It was no dog. It was just another monster.

I ran. It followed, but not for long. I was the fastest. No one could beat me. Carrying her delicate body didn't slow me down one bit. Before I knew it we were at the hedge of the building.

I couldn't see it because of the mist. It was there though. I knew. I looked at the stone with its name. My stomach writhed in agony. Painful memories. This was the place. The bus was parked outside. It looked trashed. The windows were broken. I smiled.

A dog monster peeped out from the other side of the bus. It went for us. I couldn't smash it like the bird. I wasn't ready. Instead I tossed myself and the girl aside as it jumped. I could hear it whimper when it hit the stone with the building's name.

It lay still for a moment. I let go of the girl and got up. We could escape, but I didn't want to. I knelt down next to it. Its head was shapeless. The body wasn't really a dog's either. It just walked like one. I wanted to change that. I had to.

I put my foot on its foreleg to hold it in place. It tried to bite me. I put my hands around its paw and pulled as hard as I could. The leg snapped soundly. The ends of the broken bones were sticking out of the skin. They were white just like all other animals. And people. It whimpered again. Almost like it was crying. Its blood soaked the ground.

I stood tall and kicked it in the belly. It rolled down the road a little. Then it got up. It stumbled dizzily for a while before it hobbled away.

It wasn't very nice of me, but it wanted to bite the girl. He told me to defend her no matter what. It was just a monster. I could do anything I wanted to it. Nobody would care. Right?

The girl was still lying in the grass. She was sleeping silently. She would die soon. I picked her up. All her clothes were smeared with blood. The hospital room was close to the entrance. She needed me. Her dependence washed away all the bad memories. I felt maternal. It was nice.


	7. Voyage

Lobby. It was the same old lobby. Nothing had changed when I was sleeping. No, some of the posters were new. But that was it. The colors were the same. The desks and the doors too. But it was okay. As long as the school was empty it was okay.

I pushed the door open and stepped into the hallway. Right in front of me was the door to the yard. To the left were the reception and the hallway with the class rooms. I turned right and headed to the nurse room.

The hallway was bright and filled with mist. The mist had invaded everything. It wasn't snowing inside though. The building was silent. It hadn't been silent before. There had always been someone. It just wasn't the same place. This new empty school wasn't as sad as the one that used to be here.

I put her down on the bed in the nurse room. She woke up briefly and smiled. A weak smile. She shut her eyes lay still. I had to be quick. She'd stay asleep soon.

Her vest and pullover were torn at shoulder. I removed the vest without touching her wound too much. The pullover was worse. I tried to hold her while removing it. It didn't work. It was coated with her blood. A part of her shirt was stuck in her wound too. She wouldn't be able to wear it afterwards anyway.

There were scissors, a cardboard box, and some band aid on the table. I took the scissors and cut her pullover apart. When I removed the bit from her wound it bled harder. I took off her undershirt too. It was just a little stained. In the closet I found a cloth. There was something with a strong smell too. I poured it on the cloth and washed the wound. She shook and moaned.

I couldn't read the label on the plastic bottle. It was meant for cuts and scrapes. It would sting badly and clean it. I put some more on the cloth and washed her again with the clean side. A tooth, perhaps a small stone, fell out. The bleeding stopped. Just to be sure I wrapped her up with the band aid.

The girl sighed. She was naked from the waist and up. Except for the bandage of course. I sighed. There had to be some sort of solution. I turned to the table. The box. There was a box on the table. Maybe he put it there? There was something about it.

It was filled with shredded paper. I looked down the box after opening it. Just shredded paper. Magazine paper. Thicker and colored. I dug deeper. It felt soft. Wonderfully soft. I used both hands to pull it out just slowly.

A dress. A blue uniform just like mine, complete with socks and shoes. A gift from him undoubtedly. Carefully I held it closer and sniffed. The scent was indescribable. Lovely in a way. I had forgotten how happy my own dress made me.

The rest of her stained clothes ended on the floor. I stripped her in no time. I hooked my thumb under the waistband of her panties and pulled. They were halfway off when I stopped. There were no underpants with the uniform.

I looked at her crotch. She'd catch a cold if I took her panties. I felt maternal again. There was something else as well. I couldn't remember exactly what it was, but there was something.

She sighed. I snapped out of it. It had been at least five minutes. I was still holding onto her silky white panties. It was the only clothes she had that weren't bloody. There was no need to change them now. I lifted her waist and slid her panties back on. She moaned again.

Heat. I felt warm. My cheeks burned with crimsonness. I turned away to cool off. It felt too strange. Not now. It tickled. I spread my legs a bit. It got colder. The warmth left my body slowly. Everything was okay.

In a matter of seconds she was wearing the dress. She was unconscious. It wasn't hard though. She was as light as a feather. I pulled her socks halfway up to her knees. Her feet were so small. The shoes fit.

Lastly I tied the red bow around her neck under the white collar of the dress. Something was missing though. I shook her lightly. She yawned and opened her eyes. Her big brown eyes were staring into mine. Just for a moment. Then she fell asleep again.

Tired. It was light and I felt sleepy. I had to sleep. Right now. The bed looked almost as soft as the blue fabric and the girl. I moved her a bit to the side. It was big enough. I climbed it and lay down next to her. I tucked her in and closed my eyes. I kissed her goodnight and fell asleep.


	8. Call

Happiness. Being content. It didn't take long. It surprised me, but then again I hadn't felt so peaceful before. It was the thing that parted us. The girl and me. I got out and looked at the scissors. He had thought of everything.

She was awake too. I gave her the scissors and my body. There was no mirror. I couldn't see what she did. It felt good afterwards though.

From what I could tell she had cut my hair just nicely. It was shorter than hers and not as loose, but it was okay. The ponytail was just in the way anyway. I put the scrunchie around my wrist.

The room was a bit messy. He had thought of that too though. The bloody clothes and the brown hair clippings filled the box. I took the shredded paper from the table and stuffed it into the box too. Then I closed it. The cardboard box. I opened the window and placed it outside. He would find it there if he needed it back.

I lay down in the bed again. The oder of the clothes. It was good. Now she carried the very same scent. The girl followed me. Snuggled up close to me. I put an arm around her and drifted off. We were alone in the world.

Meadow. A meadow stretched before me. I sat down in the lush grass right next to the girl who was wearing the same blue dress. She was smiling. He was there too. He was also smiling. He sat down in front of me.

Uniform. One form. Same appearance. Unity through clothes. He nodded at my hair. It wasn't just the clothes now. He removed some hair strands from my eye and put it behind my ear with his fingertips. He was protecting me. He had been all along.

Laughter. He entertained the girl and gave me time to look around. It was a valley. A valley filled with grass and a few trees. There was no water. I gazed at the hills that surrounded it all. They were steep and looked a little like a fence. The only way out were three paths where the hills suddenly opened up. One to the left, one to the right, and one behind. I wondered where we had come from. Perhaps they weren't really roads.

Picture. It wasn't real. None of it. It was a fantasy picture I had drawn once. Well, all the monsters were gone. Now it was just us. The valley was pretty, but scentless. It was like the cabin. He needed to talk somewhere and chose a place where I felt safe. Or maybe not safe. Home perhaps. But how did he know?

Obvious. He saw right through me and calmed me down. He told me about the key and what I should do. It was just like that. Simple. Somehow I knew all this. He just had to make sure I was certain. His presence had faded though. He wasn't as wonderful as before. My belly didn't tickle when he spoke anymore. Yet it felt like there was nothing wrong. It was the way it was supposed to be. I wasn't scared.

It was dark when we awoke. So dark. I couldn't see much. I felt her body next to me. The nurse room was still quiet. Nobody was around. The darkness wasn't right. We couldn't have slept that long. Or could we?

I had forgotten to ask him. Again. It was like whenever he was around I'd forget all the little things. I hadn't asked for a mirror either. I wanted to see myself more than ever. And the time. And the monsters. And the woman. Now it was too late to say anything.

She read me easily. Maybe I was just being obvious. She said it. The girl said I was pretty. No, beautiful. Her nose tip touched mine and I smiled. I told her the same. There was no reason to say anything else. This was enough.

Someone slammed the front door shut. It was blurry. We got up and hurried out in the hallway. Left. There was someone. I turned right and pulled the girl along. A door. It was unlocked. We hurried through as a light started shining somewhere behind. I shut it and turned the lock.

It was another hallway. This one lead to classes and there were stairs to the second floor and the basement. I didn't bother hiding anywhere. I sat down and leaned against the door. The one on the other side tried to open it.

Tap, tap, tap, and tap. The beat sent chills down my spine. There was something in this hallway too. It made a noise somewhere in the darkness. It came closer. No. They came closer.


	9. Master

He seemed much weaker. I wondered what it was that he had given me. I didn't feel any different. Nevertheless I had to give it a try. I concentrated. A feeling of nothingness overwhelmed me. I was empty. There wasn't anything.

The girl nodded. She understood. Monsters walked right past us. I couldn't see them clearly because of the darkness, but I knew they were there. They just didn't notice us.

I got up and took her hand. It was safe now. We walked out in the yard. There were more of them there too, but it didn't matter. They couldn't see us.

He had left another box out here. It shone just a little in the darkness. I couldn't see anything else. The girl opened it. To my amazement there were brushes and buckets of paint in the box. That's how he wanted us to do it. He had thought of everything.

She opened a bucket and handed me a brush. I dipped it in the black liquid and let the paint do the magic. Curves. Lines and corners. I let my imagination run freely.

Signs. Words. Letters. I didn't know what it was, but it felt natural. A resistance. Something safe. A shield. Nobody could hurt us. I dipped and painted and dipped and painted. Slowly, but surely it came to life.

The girl had drawn two circles and the whole thing seemed more alive. The circles enclosed what we had made so far. It was like a wide halo filled with signs. I opened the remaining buckets and started reinforcing the whole. She started painting inside the inner circle.

Lines and curves. This was meant to be. A triangle and more strange figures. Letters. Words in an alien language. I didn't know what it meant except that it was right. Yes, it was meant to be. We kept on making the lines thicker until there was no more paint. It was finished.

The mark glowed in the darkness. It warmed me up. It heated this hopeless world. It felt like he was much farther away. He couldn't help us now. We were on our own.

The girl hit the ground. She passed out and fell lifelessly. Someone hit me in the head with a mallet. I dropped to my knees. It hit again. Harder and from all sides. My head was about to explode. I fell. The ground was hard. Almost like metal floor. The soil was gone.

It kept on. Pain. Spears impaling me. Sharpness. Coldness. Agony. Ache. Sting. It squeezed my throat and cut my knees. It hit my head and ripped the life out of me. I screamed I wanted whoever it was dead. Silence.

It was over. The hammering. Nobody was beating me. A body in a pool of blood. I looked away from it. The headache was awful. This place was awful. Everything was. Something bad had happened. It was wrong.

Where the hell was he? I got up and looked at the school. Something had happened to it. It looked frightening. Like it had been burned or... There was an accident in the laboratory once. Someone spilled acid on the table and the floor and it looked like the building. I had smashed the glass and the floor changed color.

There was something else. It wasn't just acid or fire. There were metal things everywhere. I hated it. It was like a bad dream I had often. The red fence everywhere. Rust. I despised rust. Somewhere below was the cause of it all. The master. That's what he said. I had to beware. It wanted to eat me and everyone. The girl's father would have to help.

I didn't understand what he meant. He had said something about gambling on two horses. I suddenly remembered. He had also said the void was killing him and me and the girl. Things had to reach the end in one way or another. The girl's father. I was helping him and working against him. It was weird. I didn't understand.

The girl. I had almost forgotten. She was still lifeless. She wasn't breathing. I put her on a bench and blew into her mouth. I hadn't tried something like that before. They had done it on television. It felt strange. She started breathing again. Slowly. Slow breathing.

She was cold. I slid my hand under her clothes. She was cold between her shoulder blades. Much too cold. She was dying.

I shook her lightly, but she didn't wake up. I shook her hard, but she didn't wake up. I touched her face, but she didn't wake up. I held her hands, but she still didn't wake up.


	10. Piece

Warming her was essential. This place was too cold. In the basement there was a boiler. It was the only heat source I could think of. I sighed. It was down there. Whatever it was. Her dad had to take care of it. I couldn't go down there.

I rubbed her. Spontaneously. It was the way out. I took her fine hands and rubbed them. Slowly but surely they got warmer. It wasn't enough. I rubbed her arms. Inside and outside the sleeves. Her bare knees too. Her ankles. Thighs, shoulders, chest, belly.

Her cheeks turned crimson. I couldn't see them in the darkness, the glow from the sign was all red anyway, but I felt it. Her face was glowing. Her breath wasn't shallow anymore, but she still didn't respond. More. I worked harder.

I let my fingers do the walking. She moaned when I touched her injured shoulder. I lifted the shirt a little to check on the bandage. It was dry, but I couldn't see if any blood had leaked through. The red light wouldn't let me.

She moaned again. I used my underarm and she got warmer. Much warmer. I rubbed faster and she moved a little. Just a bit. She didn't say anything when I quietly spoke to her.

Seconds and minutes. Maybe hours? I never got tired. I kept moving my underarm back and forth, feeling the warmth fill the air. It was aromatic warmth. Not the smell of our dresses, but something else. The air bought a piece of it to me. Just nicely scenting warmth or whatever it was.

She panted and squirmed. I pressed my arm harder against her body. Her breath was fast and kept getting faster. Her limbs were shaking. Her belly too. The chest went up and down rapidly. At last she opened her eyes and looked at me.

I grinded hard. It turned rhythmic. Willing. Unconscious and willingly following. She wanted to get warmer also. It felt better when she was helping.

I didn't know if she was still cold. I didn't stop rubbing. She closed her eyes halfway and said something blurry. Then she cried out wordlessly. Just a long and uncontrolled moan. She shook a lot. She was dazed. The girl was able to move and I let go of her.

She was sweating and shaking. I put my palm on her forehead. It was hot. Like she was having a fever. She didn't seem sick though. At least I didn't smile when I felt bad. She was smiling. A weird smile. A contagious smile. I felt a little better.

It took a minute before she was completely conscious. She just looked at me briefly and turned away. I could feel her blushing. Her entire body was warm. I told her we had to leave. After a few pleas she turned back and got off the bench. She took my hand and we left the yard with the painting.

Through the doors and down to the basement. Further down. All the way down to the core of my nightmare. A room. Huge. Metal floor. Darkness. Horrible smell. Rust. I hated rust.

A fire was started in the middle. The room was illuminated, revealing what I already knew. An awful place. But something... no, someone. There was someone. In the other end of the great, nightmarish hall. It was him. He was there.

He wasn't alone. Something unpleasant was standing in the corner, glaring at him and us. I stuck my tongue out at it. He laughed. There was no need to be scared.

The girl's dad was suddenly there too. He didn't notice us. It noticed him though. It stomped across the floor and screamed at him. We watched them fight, the man and the beast.

He was faster than the monster. Much faster. It was almost like he was playing with it. It had hit him, but when he ran around the fire and the mechanics it couldn't follow him. He hurt it. Just a little bit. A path of blood and smelly slobber encircled the fire.

The monster was huge and could easily cope with the damage, but it was annoyed. Again and again he got away. In the end it screamed, sped up, and opened its mouth to swallow him whole. It was a fairytale I read once. And just like in the story it was a great mistake. He fired into its mouth. It dropped dead.

There was no echo. The weapon made a lot of noise, but there was no echo. It was like a dream. Nothing was really real. Fairytale and nightmare. I stared at the dead monster. The headache went away.

I put down the key he had given me. He was gone before I could ask him anything. The girl's father didn't look too good. I made sure he had seen the key. Then I concentrated and walked out. An awful noise. Somewhere. I hated it.


	11. Living

Bells. Not just any bells. Church bells. Church bells of evil. A place of pain and suffering. But it was okay. The sound of despair. Just a sound. I shouldn't... No, I wouldn't let my fear for the church prevent me from getting to the other side. They were close, but not the same.

We walked out of the school hand in hand. The sun or whatever shone through the mist. The world was light. Echo had returned. The bus was still parked by the road.

A dog looked at us through a broken school bus window. It didn't do anything. It wasn't like the other one. Just to be certain I growled as I walked past it. It was a bad idea.

We ran. We all ran. The dog and the girl and me. It was fast. Way faster than the one we ran from before. Deadly fast. It wasn't like the one I hurt either. It was larger. The one I attacked looked like it had been run over by a car. This one was an ordinary, full-sized killer dog.

It tried to bite her. Again and again it bit at her feet. I pulled her closer to me and sped up. I was dragging her along. We were flying through the street and still we weren't fast enough. We couldn't outrun it. I wasn't fast enough.

A nasty sting got me. I stepped aside and it jumped past us. It stopped and turned toward us. It wanted to kill us. It wanted to hurt the girl.

I watched it jump into her. Paralyzed. She fought it on the road. Her hands around its throat. It kept trying to bite her arms and face. It was getting closer and closer and I couldn't help her. I couldn't.

Like a fish. Snapping for air. The fear had me in an iron grip. Her eyes and cries pleaded for help. It was killing her and I didn't do a thing. I had to vomit and rolled over. It was too much. I'd fail. I failed. He'd be...

Something shone in the mist. A message perhaps? Not like last time. There was something on the road. Something shiny. It couldn't be another trap. We were already trapped.

It had to be him. The girl was still keeping its head away. There was still hope. I crawled the endless distance. It felt like an eternity. Eons. I sobbed and looked back. They were still there. Both were screaming vigorously. If only I had that vigor.

The fear let go a little. I could crawl on my hands and knees now. It was a little faster. Just a little longer. I could see it. It was a knife. He gave us a weapon. No. It wasn't a weapon. It was a ritual knife.

Ebony grip with pretty engravings. A cat with a crafty smile looked at me. An equally sneaky snake was facing the ground. It was my ritual knife. Nobody knew where I kept it. They had been searching for it. Never said anything to me. They couldn't find it.

It said in the book that it was dangerous, but I liked it. They didn't know though. I had used mommy's scissors the first time. That's why they were suspicious. But they never found it. Never found out I made it.

It made no sense. Why had he given me that? I didn't even feel like using it anymore. Though it was tempting. I stared at the cutting edge. Longed for it. It had been my only friend.

Slowly I reached out for it. It was calling for me. Someone else too. She was. The girl. She called for me. I turned around and the dog knocked me over and clasped my arm in its jaws. It hurt. I screamed.

It bit harder. It couldn't cut through the magic dress, but it hurt anyway. It kept shaking me. I thought my arm would fall off. It was strong. The dog.

The girl was up already. She hit and kicked it, but its jaw was locked. There was nothing else to do. I screamed and told her not to. It was too late. The fine blade was already halfway through the neck. The girl pushed it all the way through.

A silent dog's headless torso ended on the road with a squash. A fountain of blood. She and I were covered in dog blood. It kept pouring out of the open neck and the decapitated head.

The girl pulled its jaws apart and removed the head from my arm. It stopped hurting. I stared at the knife on the ground. I didn't say anything. It wasn't the same. He had sharpened it. It had never been able to make deep cuts before. I shuddered. If I had used it I would have hurt myself. More than usual.


	12. Dead

No longer white and blue. The dresses were now red and purple. It was a shame. Luckily the scent of the clothes remained. The girl licked her blood stained lips and smiled. Same contagious smile. I reached out and removed blood from her cheeks. It tastes just like my own. Maybe all blood tasted the same.

I picked up the head. Even in death it looked angry. I wasn't afraid of it anymore though. I let go and kicked it. Stupid dog. It landed further down the road.

We turned our backs on it and walked on. I held her hand and the knife. Once again he had proved that he protected us. He had both recovered my favorite knife and given us a weapon. I felt safe holding on to it.

The church was dangerous ground. I led us around the back. There was no need to go closer. We returned to the main road after the gas station. Up on the bridge. I wanted to go down to the water if only to wash myself. But there wasn't time.

A wall and lots of water. The bridge was up. We could not get past the river. There was nothing we could do. He obviously wanted us to take another way. There was a road close to where they crashed. Down by the lake there were several. I didn't know what was closest.

It sat on the railing when we left the bridge. A messenger or guide. There was blood on the road leading back to the crash. That was a bad sign. I nodded at the bird. Or was it a bat? It could have been a dinosaur too. It was oddly familiar.

I was about to go toward the lake when it cackled and shook its wings. Not that way either? It shook its head. I took another step in the same direction. It was too much for the messenger. The lizard proved that it could fly.

Suddenly I could see the resemblance. It was like the one in the alley. Same body, same wings. Just bigger. It wasn't completely identical to the dinosaur. It was just a dumb bird.

Others answered its call. They came along the road leading to the lake. They were trying to surround us. We ran for it. Back toward the school as fast as possible. We didn't get very far. Just in front of the church. They cut us off.

I heard the church door close as we stopped. There were people inside. They couldn't help us. I tightened my hand around the knife. Waited. And waited.

Slowly we drifted to the west. We moved and they moved. Little by little. Constantly keeping eyes on each other. Step by step. I felt relief getting away from the church. I heard the church door slam in the mist. We stopped.

The leader uttered something and the others all sat down on the ground. All except for one. It kept hovering and staring at me. I told the girl to sit down. The knife was strangely cold in my hand. It was now.

The ugly lizard shot forward and attacked. I rolled under it, avoiding the wings and mouth. It glared and tried again. I clenched my fist and hit it in the face, dodging it again. It squeaked.

Another bird suddenly attacked. Two on one. Cheater. They cheated. I dropped to the ground and slashed it with the knife. Squishy sound. It yelped and crashed. Desperation. Silly bird. It cried out and tried to get up. Guts were spread out on the road below it. So much blood.

The first one attacked again. I hit the wing. It started bleeding, but stayed in the air. It kept gazing at me as it moved to its wounded friend. I smiled. I felt good. I had killed one of them.

The leader, the largest spread its wings and left. The remaining three still surrounded us. Pink bodies. Wingspans as large as an adult. They had seen the knife. They'd attack together now.

I whispered to the girl. She got up and took my hand. We were like the birds. Same appearance and different size. Parent and child. Mother and daughter. Or maybe not. I couldn't help thinking there was something wrong with it. We were different.

I squeezed her hand. We ran. They went for us. Attacked again and again. We turned toward the lake before reaching the church. One of them hit me. I fell. Gunshots.

Blood. Two were dead. Someone stepped out of the mist. Blue shirt. Police uniform. It was the cop. She was staring at the girl. The last lizard fluttered up above. As it dived she took aim.

Bang. Bang. It fell. It fell from the sky. I saw it. It fell right through the ground and disappeared. No squashing. It wasn't there. The cop followed it with her eyes. As if it landed down below us. She looked at the girl. She called out for her.

Why didn't she move? She didn't go any closer. She wouldn't. She looked at the road again. Like there was something wrong with it. I motioned the girl to run.

The cop kept staring after the girl had left. Shaking her head. She didn't lay her eyes on me once. She just turned around and left. Was she blind?


	13. Marble

She was doing something when I found her. The girl. She was with the injured dog. It wasn't really a monster. It was just weird. The leg was broken and the fur stiff from dried blood. But it was alive. All of a sudden I felt better.

The girl stroked it. Patted it. Put a finger in its eye. I screamed. Put my arms around her and pulled her away. Tears. I cried. My tears in her hair. She shouldn't have done it. She didn't say anything.

The pitiful creature limped away. It moved in a strange way. There was blood all over it. How could it still be alive? I stopped sobbing. My tears were red. We needed to wash up.

Streets and mist and silence. The smell of blood would attract more dogs. Or those headless things. I shivered. Shivered and ran. The wind pressed against my face.

White and tall. I told myself it was just a building. Like the school. It was empty. Less threatening in a way. We went inside. Another lobby. More corridors. The girl's dad. I concentrated so that we wouldn't be seen.

We followed him. In a room. There was a man in there. He had killed a monster. They talked. The girl's dad and the man. Somehow I slipped. The man noticed me. He pointed his gun at me. Icy. It hurt. I fell. Lower. Deeper.

Into his arms. He caught me. Relief. Such relief. I wasn't hurt. The dress had stopped the bullet and he had saved me. Saved us. The girl was here too. It wasn't the same building.

He put me down and talked. Talked about lots of things. It all seemed simple. This time there wasn't any paint though. Crayons. Paper. He wouldn't let us have them. Pointed at our clothes. Told us we were no good painted red.

The last thing he showed us. Bathroom. It was some kind of house. There were windows. A garden outside. Nothing I remembered. Perhaps this wasn't a place I had dreamt about. He looked old. I hadn't realized until now. Like he had aged in seconds. Sick. Not well.

He waved goodbye and vanished. The girl and I went into the bathroom. There wasn't any washing machine. I probably couldn't use one anyway. There were showers in the bathroom. It could work.

I turned on the water. It had a perfect temperature. I stepped in. Let it wash off the red. Like magic. The water dissolved it. Cleaned it. Dragged it down the drain. It wasn't quite enough. There was still a bit that was stuck.

I took off my dress. Dropped it on the floor. The dress shirt too. The panties. And the socks and shoes. I wrung it and scrubbed it against the floor. It worked. The girl did the same. I helped her out of her clothes. Her bandage.

The shower. She turned it off. There was a bath tub. A strange bathroom. Neither sink nor toilet. Just the things we needed. I filled the marble bathtub. Foam. I couldn't see my reflection. The water was warmer. Warmer than the shower.

I hopped in. Hot. It hurt a little. But it was nice. It eased all the sore spots. My shoulders. My back. The girl got in too. It wasn't a very large tub. I could barely stretch my legs. My back pressed against the wall.

She sat down opposite to me. Resting her legs on mine. Her feet on my thighs. The heat made her moan. I smiled and rested my head on the edge. This was the relaxing. My thoughts drifted away from the stupid reality. This was healing water. Magic liquid.

Feet. Small. I took one and massaged it gently. She smiled. We had traveled for so long. Longer than I had ever run or walked. She was sore. I pressed my fingertips lightly against the sole of her foot. She closed her eyes.

I did the same to her other foot. Gently. Softly. To be tender. Kind. Kissed her ankle. She put her hands on the edge of the bathtub. Her palms were facing upwards. She was happy. I had kept her safe so far. I let go of her foot.

She slid forward. Stopped when her heels reached me. Snoring soundly. She was content. The water reached her mouth. When she leaned back a little she could breathe.

It reached my... It was so strange. When he had awoken me. When I was in the cabin so long ago. It was so different. I didn't look the same. I had slept for so long. Breasts. They were weird. The surface parted the left one in two. The lower part was sweating. The upper was cold.

They were soft. They swayed a bit when I ran. It was nice when she bumped into them. She did it a lot. I tried to lower them into the water. Her feet pressed harder against me. It was difficult. She wiggled her feet and it tickled.

I leaned my head back. Ignored the tickling. The marble tub was soft. My head rested tenderly. One of her feet slipped. Hit me right in the center. I moaned. She was still sleeping. I tried to adjust myself. It only made it worse. Even the slightest movement. I sighed. Tried to sleep. Enjoying it somehow. Marble. Softness.


	14. House

Sleep of beautiful. House of wonderful. Despite the faint pain I leaned forward. Shook her until we were both awake. Contagious happiness. She stretched her arms and legs. Yawned. Pressed even harder against my center. Then she got up.

The girl stepped out onto the bathroom floor. I joined her. We were dripping wet. Soaking the floor. We took the clothes, the paper, and the crayons. Outside. The other door in the room was closed. I didn't feel like opening it. Outside was better.

A garden. Small and surrounded by a tall, green hedge. Circular. The grass was lovely. Caressed my naked feet. Emerald green. Greener than anything. I felt an urge to lie down. The girl nodded and threw herself onto the grass.

Dresses and shoes. I put them down to dry. Her bandage was gone when we awoke. Her wound. I sat down next to her. I felt her skin. Her shoulder was fine. No sign of injury. Not even a scar. It had to be the sleep. Or the water.

She smiled and rolled over. Started drawing. She gave me some paper. The beige crayon was enough for me. I drew a worm. I wanted to draw a butterfly too. She used all the crayons. She was good. Didn't want to disturb her.

I rolled onto my back. There was a sky high above us. Blue sky. Beyond the hedge it was covered in mist, but just above us it was clear. A little bit of sun reached us. Warmth. The clothes would dry in no time. And so would we. Already my belly felt less wet.

Green grass and blue sky. This was happiness. A shame it wouldn't last forever. The moment was nice. Something I wanted again. Maybe when it was all over. Lying on the softest lawn, looking at the sky.

Perhaps this place was of my imagination. The cabin and the valley were. It could be. A place of happiness. I wanted to lie naked on the grass. For the rest of my life. And I wanted to see my face. See my reflection. That's all I really needed.

She was done. I got up next to her. A nurse. She had drawn a nurse. And a hospital room. It was quite good. She had used all the crayons. There weren't any left. She looked nice. The nurse. Someone I'd trust. It was weird. I never trusted any adults before. Except for him. But he was different. Not really a grownup.

We were both dry now. The clothes too. Clean and aromatic. Like when we got it. New. Flawless. Perfect. It felt so soft and protective. We put it on again. I tied her red bow and she tied mine. Everything. Helped each other. More than needed. Family. Or something else.

We left the garden. We left the house. Back into the mist. We left behind the drawings. He said he wanted them. That he'd handle the hospital for us. We were in the street again. Right in front of the next place.

A shop. A shop that sold old things. Green above the door. We walked down the stairs. Through the door. It was dim inside. There was nothing from him. Empty.

Through the bookcase. Into the back room. I'd been here before. But I couldn't remember much. So long time ago. So much sleep. Too long.

It was not a place of happiness. An altar. Candles. My stomach twisted. This was too much. Memory. I wanted to destroy it. But I couldn't. The cardboard box was here. A gift.

She opened it. Pulled up a bucket of paint. The same as last time. Except for the leather. She handed it to me. A sheath. Cover for the knife. It was in the too. The knife. I carefully pressed it down the sheath. This time I wouldn't drop it.

The strap was too short for me. I carefully attached it to the girl's shin just below the knee. It was nice of him to make a sheath for it. It worked better as a weapon now. Carrying it all the time was hard. I wondered where I had dropped it.

A bucket was opened. I dipped my pencil. We painted the same thing. There was a bit less space. But it was okay. It felt so natural to both of us. She made the nicest of circles. I made the signs.

Howling. Came from behind. Unexpected. I fell first. Awful sound. Distant. Headache. Pain. The girl collapsed. The painting was unfinished. Elsewhere. It wasn't here. The room changed. Hostile.

Flames. Fire of misery and death. The candles on the altar. Alit. More. More. I could see nothing else. Cage. I screamed to wake up. The girl was silent. The flames hummed.

The place was laughing at us. I knew it. The flames were strong. I couldn't get near the altar. Anger. I wanted to leave a scar in its face. I got up. Dipped the brush.

The girl would die soon. I wrote on the wall. I wrote something. Something the people with the altar would hate. I smirked as the letters formed. This would be enough. The headache. 


	15. New

I had passed out. My head hurt. I was on my back. She was next to me. Bending over me. Asking if I was okay. Her worried face. I cupped her cheek. She smiled. Pulled me up and supported me.

It was back to normal. Misty and light. The world. Or maybe not normal. Just usual. Usual misery. I sat down. Leaned against the wall. The girl would have to do it. Complete the painting.

Half life. Not really there. Lights danced before me. She shook me. The girl was done with the painting. Had slept. Sighing. To be dizzy. She pulled me up. Straightened my dress. Took my hand and pulled me along.

There was someone. In the shop. I couldn't focus. No concentration. She did it. The girl. We walked past her dad. He couldn't see us. Out in the street. The cop was there. She walked into the shop and we ran.

The girl had changed. She was so much stronger. We ran. Faster than ever. Faster than the adults chasing us. Not real humans. They couldn't catch us. Nobody could. Not even him. I smiled. And tripped.

Darkness. The girl dropped to her knees. The howl was distant. But much closer to her. She cried out. Covered her ears. Rust. I watched her. Her wrinkled face. Staring madly into the darkness. Above her.

Fluttering in the night. In total darkness. It could see us somehow. The fake dinosaur. Much larger than the ones before. I thought I was the only one who could see. Maybe the girl too. It landed. Hopped closer. Stared at the helpless person on the ground who was me. Stared and grinned.

The shapeless head was noisy. Not breathing. Something. Slimy sound. It moved closer. I could feel its breath. Then it stopped. Just as if I wasn't there. I couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. Snapping for air again. The girl.

She jumped. Onto its back. Wrapped her arms around its neck. It screamed from surprise. Shook its wings. She held on. Squeezed its throat. Shouting. I told her to use the knife.

It knocked her off. Send her flying. Crashing into the wall. I cried out. It looked at me. Whispered. And attacked. I let it hit me. Beat me. Make my arms and legs numb and blue. The more it hurt. The more I smiled.

The girl yelled in the distance. The beating stopped. It moved frantically. Confused. It couldn't see me. It turned to the girl. Hovered. Screamed and attacked. She waved to me.

I cried. Just as it was about to get her. It turned around and looked at me. Frustrated. Angry. It went for me. And the girl called out again. I shouted. I shouted as she moved up behind it. Then I stopped.

She spoke softly. I held my breath. Too scared to move. It spun around just as she hit it. Right in the face. It made a weird sound. Then it fell. Something living that had covered the face. They were crawling around on the road. Creeps. Or worms.

And blood. There was blood on the road. There was blood on the knife in her hand. She was smart. I wondered why it could only see one of us at the time. It was odd. Maybe it was the same with the cop? She saw right through me.

The girl wasn't smiling. I didn't feel too good. It hurt when she pulled me up. Supported me. Helped me. And in a way it felt good. The way she held on to me. The way we stumbled around in the darkness. Outside some restaurant.

She threw me aside. Evaded the monster as it dived. Tables and chairs were tossed around. Smashed. A trail of blood was left behind. It was angry. More than before. I crawled into cover under a table.

The headache worsened. The world was so loud. My heart. And my ears. Constant beating. Not music. The monster would hear it. I couldn't find the girl.

Too fast. Or too slow. The world was closing in on us. Or me. I couldn't find her. I could call out. But it could hear me. It was silent. But there. It was there. Waiting for me.

Darkness. It was suddenly real. I couldn't see a thing. Blind. Under a table. I could feel it. I crawled a bit forward. Closer to the restaurant. Under another table. I held my breath. It was there. Somewhere. The girl had to kill it.

Monster wings smashed a table. The first one. Where I just came from. I let out a whimper. I could hear it hover. The darkness was thick. Another table was broken. It would get here.

Sting. My guts hurt. I couldn't hear it anymore. Didn't know where it was. Headache. Misery. My whole body was aching. So sore. I moved on. Splash. A splash. Blood. Someone was bleeding. Someone right on top of the table.

I tried to get up. It was stupid. Smashed my head against the table. It flipped over. I flipped over. Lying on my back. The monster hovered above me. Screaming. The end.


	16. Born

I was finished. The monster triumphed. Dropped down on top of me. Dug its claws in my shoulders. It hurt. Even through the dress. The monster spread its wings. Flapped them. Higher. Up into the darkness. Couldn't see the ground.

It screamed. Awful scream. It let go. The air was heavy. The ground was hard. Sound of bones breaking. Or wood. I couldn't feel my legs. Couldn't feel anything. Numb.

Splintered chairs and tables. Everywhere. I crawled blindly through the badlands. There had to be rescue somewhere. The monster grabbed onto my leg. Defeated. Couldn't do anything. It dragged me back through the waste. Lifted me.

The second fall was worse. My shoulder. I couldn't move. Only wait. Wait for it to sit down on me. It held onto my shoulders again. The dress couldn't keep out the pain. Tears.

The monster flapped its wings. Brought me higher and higher. Over the rooftops. I could see him. His silhouette. He had his back turned on me. He didn't more. Why didn't he help? The fall. It was too far. I would die. Didn't he need me anymore? Had he found someone else? He didn't do anything.

It let go. I rushed toward the ground. The world was spinning. I relaxed. There was no reason to survive. I wanted him to feel bad. Feel terrible about letting me go. Maybe then...

The softest of clothes and skin. Bliss. The darkness let go. I was staring into her eyes. Lost. The girl had caught me. I was useful after all. I smiled. Stuck my tongue out at the monster high above. It dived. Screaming.

Just as it was about to attack. She stepped aside. The ground burst open. Something white emerged. High into the air. A worm. A bright worm. It bit the lizard's head right off. Headless corpse trashed the remaining chairs.

It lay still. The worm. My worm. The one I drew. It had saved me. Something was moving inside. I wanted to touch it, but she wouldn't let me. She shook her head. Walked away. The rusty iron ground made noises in the night.

Back at the restaurant something white gained size. Swollen. The worm had eaten the monster and grown. It exploded with a faint sound. White skin on the road. The new born screamed. Just around the corner.

The hospital. The girl held me closer. It was a miracle she could carry me. The man in the hospital. He had shot me. Wanted to hurt us. I hugged her.

A door. The hospital gate. She concentrated to disguise us. The gate was opened. It was the girl's dad. He looked troubled. And determined. I wondered who was helping him. Except for the key I hadn't done much. Maybe the worm had helped him?

He ran. Up the fire stairs. The new born rounded the corner. A bee. Or a moth. Light. Almost glowing. Not the butterfly I had intended. It glared at us. Spread its wings. Flew up. Up to the rooftop. Up to the girl's dad. It didn't look nice at all. Why did he make it like that?

They fought up there. He shot it. But it wouldn't die. It stabbed him. Hurt him. Over and over again. Her tears wetted my face. She couldn't be with him anymore. Never again. But he was still her dad. She told me.

She moved on. The knife could do it for sure. But if he saw us. The woman. She would find us. She'd kill the girl. We couldn't let him see her. More tears. So much sadness. He had betrayed us. And now the girl's dad would die. No sense. Nothing at all.


	17. Second

A girl. A beautiful girl. My girl. Strong and weak. Her soft arms. She held me close and turned around. Said she had to. I nodded. She put me down. Her eyes were burning. I felt it fill her from top to toe. Her limbs were shaking.

She spread her legs. Solid stance. Held up her hand. Palm facing the dying man and the moth. A shout from behind. A silent shout. And silent and deadly and violent and strong and fast and hard and full and nerve killing and bone breaking and awful and lovely and everything and anything and something and nothing and all the things on her mind shout that tore air and dust and mist and microbes and everything apart as it danced spirally through her boiling body toward the enemy that was threatening her dad and had to die an awful death and pulled itself together to form a spear that pierced the bright shell and cut through the interior and finally crushed the moth's heart sending the beast into its doom.

Only in death would the monster be silent. I could see him. He had been watching. Doing nothing. I glared. He smiled. The girl's dad was safe. The girl picked me up. I couldn't walk. She was so strong. My hero. Not like him. My lovely hero.

The light returned. Quiet howling far away. The old dumb world returned. Fake snow and mist. Better than the sad darkness and rust. The town. It didn't care about us. Better this way.

We had done the stupid school. And those other places. I wondered what he had done to the girl's drawing. I didn't want to go back to the hospital. The man with the gun. He could still be there. Somewhere else.

He had mentioned the lighthouse. No reason to trust him anymore. I wanted to hurt him. Make him pay. It was so unfair to the girl's dad. And to the girl. I wondered why he had turned against us.

In the cabin. He was so nice. Gave me everything. But later he looked to old. Or sick. I wondered. I had a feeling. We'd find out. In time. Patience.

She carried me toward the lake. It was settled. The lighthouse. Right and left. No bird monsters or dogs. Couldn't see us. I had never really felt safe before. But now.

I had dozed off. Or maybe she was just that fast. The lake wasn't far away. We stopped outside a house. An adult place. I didn't like it. She didn't care. Carried me inside.

Bottles. Tables for games with small balls. Green. We continued. The bathroom. Filthy. But it was okay. She let go of me. I could stand on my own.

The girl turned on the water. Wetted her hands. I pulled up my dress so she could wash me. No blood. My skin was blue and purple. But it got off when she washed it. The pain left me alone.

Everywhere. She cleaned it all. Washed my sorrows away. To feel better. I wasn't sore anymore. As good as new. I looked at the broken mirror. Trace of sadness. Reminded me. I wanted to see myself. There were no mirrors anywhere.

The girl said I was pretty. Wasn't enough. I asked her. She didn't say anything. But I could sense it. She wanted to see herself too. Wondered. Someone had broken all the mirrors. So unfair.

I straightened the dress. And the red bow. The light went out. Weak howling somewhere. I hated this place. Took her hand. Something scratched the toilet stall door. From the inside. I didn't want to know. What it was. Probably something nasty. We left the bathroom.


	18. Impact

The man was there. In the bar room. We were totally unprepared. In a second he caught me. Pushed me into the wall. To despair. His breath was awful. Couldn't move.

He threw me into the green table. Shouted. He was scared. Wanted me to tell what happened to everything. To the town. I cried. Shook my head. I didn't know what to say. It was always like that. The town.

It wasn't enough. He wouldn't let me go. He knew me. Somehow. He'd hurt me. He'd do something awful. His eyes. They were wrong. I didn't like him. I wanted to scream at him. To go away. But I was too afraid.

He kneeled in front of me. And the bathroom door was pushed open. Headless monster. Just one. From the toilet likely. But he was kneeling. Just the right height. I held my breath as it jumped.

He fell screaming and I was free. The girl pulled me away. On the other side of the bar. She sat down. Let my head rest in her lap. Stroked my hair. Hummed a tune. To make me relax. It worked.

Someone else came in. I couldn't see anything from behind the bar. But I didn't want to move now. Gunshot. The girl rocked me. Calmed me down.

The girl's dad. He shot the monster. Not the man. I wished he had. He wasn't nice. They talked. The man and the girl's dad. They talked and the girl sang quietly. For the longest time. Just her and me.

They left. One at a time. Leaving just the two of us. I felt safe. Just for a while. There was time. Time to just sit still. Comfort. Cradle.

A lighthouse was waiting. For us. It waited just for us somewhere. We had to paint it. Complete the sign. Of our independence. Seal it. Make it true. Or whatever it all meant.

He had explained it some time ago. But I didn't get it. It was weird. And now I couldn't ask him. If I ever did see him again... I felt it in the girl too. He would have to pay. We could protect each other. Totally and fully without his help.

Enough was enough. She got up and I got up. I could walk on my own now. She had washed the pain away. But it was best when I held her hand. And she, no she didn't mind.

It was dark outside. Dark everywhere. Annoying. We wandered down the road. Down to the lake. It was quiet. Across the bridge. Toward the lighthouse. I couldn't see the light in the mist. I couldn't see much.

He was there. His silhouette. I could feel his smirk. I wanted to kill him. The adults surrounded us. The girl and I. Couldn't get to him. I was supposed to feel bad. For wanting him dead.

But there's nothing wrong with me. The adults always scolded. I said it. Nothing wrong with me. Their children. In the school. Louder. Nothing wrong with me. Everyone. All of them. Even him. I screamed. So loud. Nothing wrong with me.

The knife was in my hand. It sang in the night. Severed the neck of the closest adult. The body hit the floor. I let it. Let it happen. Attacked the others. Murdered them and murdered more. They tried to touch. Tried to hurt. They all got the knife.

They were dead and he was gone. I didn't see him leave. Never did. The girl put the knife in the sheath. Took my hand. There was no blood on it. Only on the ground. She smiled. Thanked me for protecting her.

Past the building and everything. The dock. There were monsters around. But it was okay. The girl did so they couldn't see us. On toward the lighthouse. Somewhere by the water. I couldn't sense anything in the darkness. Except for her.

But it was there and we got there. The girl had taken over. I felt sick still. My belly hurt. She pulled me along. Up the stairs and through the door. It was dark inside. Even darker than outside.

Empty. There wasn't anyone. Not that there was supposed to. If he had been here. I would have told him. Right in his face. Right there. But there was no one. We went up the staircase. A long staircase.

Howling in the distance. Headache. Somewhere inside my head. It hurt. Beating. Loud. But not like before. It spread. Consumed it all. Let go of me and spread out. Everywhere. It was weird. We reached the top and I puked. Puked all over the rust.


	19. Lost

The girl comforted me. Smiled and held me until it was over. Calming words. She picked me up. Ran her fingers through my hair. It felt nice. Even when the world was awful. She kissed my nose and put me down.

We had to paint the roof. The girl said she'd do it. I could just rest. She had the paint already. Not from him. She wanted it. He hadn't left it here. She did it on her own. We weren't really lost without him.

She painted circles and she wrote signs. She made me certain that she's all mine. I only wanted for the whole world to see. But life grew sadder and they all hated me. Before this day I only wanted to die. The end was this great high but she took my fear away.

It was like with him. At least before he ignored us. But not quite. It wasn't totally the same feeling. But close. And still far. The girl's hands were warm. Much warmer than his. And her face too.

She finished up. The mark was glowing. Right on top of the lighthouse. Soon we'd be free. I got up. Looked at the painting. The girl's dad suddenly appeared. Hadn't heard him coming.

He looked at me. Talked. I didn't like his tone. Like I had done something wrong. But he was alive. That was good. The girl took my hand and her dad reached out for me. He couldn't touch us. Couldn't see us. We ran down the stairs. Away from the tower.

There were big buildings on the dock. We hid inside. From the monsters. They could smell us. Even in the darkness. Hiding in the warehouse was safer. Behind the boxes.

They were scratching the wall. Stupid things. They couldn't get in. They were stuck out there. I leaned against something. It was soft. The girl went somewhere. I couldn't see her.

Pitiful. And broken. The dog was in here too. Didn't know how it got here. But it was the same. All covered in blood. An eye was missing. Bone parts sticking out of the front leg. But it wasn't dead. It whimpered.

Tears. It was my fault. There was nothing right about it. I cried a little more. Held out my hand. It staggered. Moved closer. Licked my fingers with the tip of its tongue. It had forgiven me. More tears. I stroked its head. Just nicely.

The girl returned. I wanted to tell her. So overjoyed. But I couldn't smile. Her face was so concerned. She was worried. I didn't understand what it was. I couldn't see any danger.

Then she launched. Kicked the dog in the belly. Sending it flying into a crate. Crushing. The ribs. They were sticking out. More blood. More tears.

I cried harder. The girl too. She hugged me and cried because I cried. Because it was all so sad. She didn't know. She didn't know it was our friend. I squeezed her in my arms. Kissed her cheek. Looked into her eyes.

It wasn't dead. The dog kept staring at me. Sadness and pain. In its eyes. I got up. Even though I was weak. I got up and went over to it. Suffering. It wouldn't survive. There was nothing left to do.

I lifted my right foot. And stepped down on the dying. As hard as I could. More crushing. The ribcage wasn't round anymore. But it still whimpered. The dog. I stomped again. Then with both feet.

She helped out. I felt angry. More than ever. Not at her. Everyone else. Myself a little. Apparently. She felt the same. Minutes or hours. Bones and guts and blood and flesh.

It didn't look like a dog any longer. Scattered all over. Even the head. She had jumped on it. Lots of times. And now it was all over the floor and things. Except for us. We were clean like newly fallen snow. Real snow. Not the fake outside. True snow.

I felt a strange kind of joy. I had destroyed something. And someone was with me. Weird. I'd always been alone when I...

The girl took my hand and led the way. There was one last place.


	20. Carol

The park wasn't far away. She still was the strongest. She still led the way. But I felt clean. I was supposed to feel bad. About the dog. But I couldn't. Something was missing. Slowly it all vanished.

When the girl first got here. Memories. To slowly return. I knew the way. Always. But now it was fading. Almost gone. I felt les. Less real. A shadow. Someone caught. In a dream.

The park was alien. I saw it all. Remembered nothing. Thick air surrounded. A layer of rust covered everything. Like everything had burned. But I didn't hate it. No longer. So far away.

We looked at the amusements. Carousel and other spinning things. I didn't feel like riding anything. So sad. So empty. We were all alone.

The girl was searching. For a place to paint. One more. Just one and we'd be free. I just tagged along. Couldn't remember what he had said. The whole place looked the same.

I sat down. On a bench. She kept searching. I didn't want to help. Rather sleep. To be tired. Way too tired. Had to sleep. I rested on the bench. The girl wandered off. Left me alone in the darkness.

I started singing. A song. Without real lyrics. Just flowing tones. A beat came along. I sang and something metallic scrambled. Harsh and cutting. Like the knife. Although less fine.

It was the carousel. It was moving. I knew it. Felt it in the empty park. It was spinning. Slowly taking over. It was humming a tune of its own. I stopped singing. It wasn't friendly. Something was happening. The girl.

Circular repetitive movement. Horses hovering up and down. Up and down. Round and round. I felt dizzy already. Sick. And the carousel kept going.

They screamed in the rusty night. Backing up the awful tune. The tune and the screaming. Fighting really. I knew who they were. I knew their singing. Even with my eyes wide shut. Even now.

The first was the easy one. Not so deep. A man. A certain one. It was the girl's dad. Didn't know where she was. But it was definitely her dad. His fatherly voice. So unlike the voice of him.

The second one was harder. No real words. Only grunting. Moaning. Mixed with gunshots. I had hoped it was the woman. But it was not. The cop. She seemed nice. Why they had to fight.

The carousel kept spinning. He was there. Standing right next to me. I wanted wipe the smirk off his face. But when his eyes met mine... The love sprouted once again.

It wasn't that I forgot about the girl. But the hate. To be washed away. He took it all. All my strength. I had wanted to kill him. I had been so sure of it. But now... His pale face. I couldn't resist. Couldn't do anything but watch. That's what he wanted me to.

The girl's dad fought the cop. He murdered her. And I was just looking. I wanted them both to live. But I couldn't tell him. He was just smiling. I couldn't do anything. The girl had the knife.

I wondered. Maybe that was it. If he would only leave us alone. Then he vanished again. Cold. Until the girl returned.

She was crying. Told me about the carousel. The cop was all weird. Possessed. That's the word the girl used. Sent chills down my spine. She has lost the knife. And the cop was dead. Nothing made any sense. What was he after?

I comforted her. We'd do without the knife. Her dad would be fine. As long as he would leave us alone. Somewhere. I knew. I knew he wouldn't.


	21. Third

We met in the middle. Right in the middle. The park was the end. Nowhere to go. Nowhere to hide. There was no paint. Nowhere to paint. The girl's dad caught up with us. Right in the middle. The cop's dying breath. Still hanging in the air. The tune. It had stopped.

He talked to me. No. He talked at me. His mood. I didn't like it. Not at all. But he was scared. Like me. The girl's dad moved closer.

Just then. In the distance. Something in the darkness and mist and snow. Wings. Breathing slowly. It was huge. Much larger than the last one. It would eat him whole.

The girl's dad wasn't nice. But I had to. I couldn't let it hurt him. The girl. I owed it to her. The feeling was there. Again. She took my left had. I raised the right. Toward the monster.

It was closing in. Feeling. It streamed from her and me. All the way through everything. My hand was flat. Palm facing the enemy. Faster. Heartbeats. Slow motion. A burden let go. Of my heart.

She was done. It rushed through her hand to my hand and encircled my waist and warmed my bare knees and tickled my feet and went up and up and out until it filled my hand and fingers and there could be no more feeling anywhere inside me and her and time stopped.

Eyes didn't see it. But I felt it. She did too. It rippled through the fake snow and air and mist and darkness. It hit the monster. Dead on. Uttered a silent shout. Vaporized. Nothing left.

The girl's dad was hit too. Somehow. He got up again. Didn't look hurt really. I wanted to talk. But nothing came out. It wasn't meant to be.

The girl pulled my hand. I followed her. We had to get out soon. Painting or no painting. Then the world froze. Not cold. Just frozen. Everything stood still.

I turned my head. Looked at the girl's dad. He had something. Stunning. Blazing. Hovering. Glowing. A box accenting. Into the air. Superior. Suddenly I could see. The woman. The enemy. She was standing right behind the girl's dad.

He was here too. I wanted to kill him. But I couldn't move. He was right in front of me. Equally stunned. Weird. Terrified. He was all different. Nothing. He wasn't strong. Anymore.

The girl. Her mouth was open. But I couldn't hear anything. Staring at the strange box. In the air. A triangle. It shone. Brighter and brighter. Until I was blind.

Choking. No air. Couldn't breathe. The light shot right through me. No more. Falling. Ground. Pain everywhere. Knees were bleeding. Gashes filled with dirt. Orange. Rust. Blood wetted the gratings. It hurt.

The woman. Standing next to me. The girl was gone. The woman. She was looking at me. Her mouth was moving. Lies. Or something else. I couldn't hear. Couldn't hear anything. Her mouth just moved.

It probably wasn't nice. She didn't look nice. Whatever she said. It had to be horrible. Sighing. I whimpered. The girl wasn't here. He was gone too. It was just the girl's dad and the woman. And that stupid box.

Darkness. It grew. Out of my mind. Ate it all. Slowly. Howling all the way. Right in my ears. Couldn't cover them. Then light. The woman made a light. Not a happy one. I didn't like it. Didn't like anything about her. Maybe... No, not maybe. She had won. The light grew. And the darkness grew. We were sucked it. Then it all...


	22. Twin

Beak. Break. Meek. Make. Sake. Fake. Lake. Water. Dry. Drier. In water. Memories. In the pond. Staring. Black water. Red water. Thoughts. And. Mind. Pot of water. Something. Yearning. Need. To do something. Something. Memory. Not remember. Want. Must. Not something. Not a thing. Someone. A person. Hate. Or fear. The enemy.

I had lost. To the woman. The woman had won. The woman had caught me. I had lost. It. I had lost it.

Is what I should do I can't do anything is what I should be doing anything I can't do I should I do anything can't do anything is anything I can't do what is what I should do I can't do anything I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't there is no light all the light has gone it has gone I can't do anything is the light gone all I can do is anything no light is there no can do anything.

I can't do it! I can't move! I can't lift myself up from the floor. I want to but I can't. I've lost. I've lost it all. No one loves me. Nobody loves me.

Someone has to save me. Anybody. I don't know anyone. There's no one. All alone. Alone in the dark. The pond is dead. No memory. I'm alone. Someone. Anyone. Tell me what to do. My. My. My. My hero.

Her hair was so soft. So nice. If only I could reach out and touch it. Feel it. Grasp it and hold her and feel her... Blushing. Warm face. Not dead. I was alive.

Darkness faded to the light. But she wasn't there. Other people were. I was awake as ever. The room was huge. With rust on the floor. I hated it already.

Him. He was there. I wanted to murder him. For hurting the girl's dad. But I couldn't. His eyes were stone cold. Not friendly. Why wouldn't he love me? He had to. He...

Warm. Another pair of eyes. Staring. Kind. Playful. It was not the girl. But the dress. It was the same. Same dress. Same blue protective wonder clothes. How did she get it? Did he give it to her?

Not the girl. I'd seen her before. Somewhere. In the dark room. The house. She was in the mirror so many years ago. She was me. And still not really. Not me. Not the girl. Why did she look so happy?

The shadow child. The one the woman had caught. Earlier. But the shadow was gone. She looked just like me. Like the old me.

She attacked. Knocked me over. Straddled me. Her hands on my throat. Squeezing. She said nothing. He did.

The girl was dead. He said it. He said I'd been a bad girl. It was my fault. All of it. The girl who had died. And now me.

The old me choked me. It hurt. He said she would come out. Couldn't stay awake. Dying.

More people appeared. The girl's dad. The woman. And... I was on the floor. Couldn't call out. They couldn't see me. I was a ghost. To them.

The old me. The light shadow. She was standing in the middle. Shining. Bright. Like in the picture in the... An angel. Or something else. She smirked at me. It was her. Her fault I couldn't get up. She was keeping me. Keeping me down. On the floor. On the hated rust.

The man was there too. He had shot me. Earlier. But he couldn't see me. Not now. No, it was more than that. He shouted. At the woman. They were enemies too? I felt a rush. Hope.

The man finished talking. Then he threw it. The bomb. A glass bottle. Red. Not like blood. A nice red. I watched it sail through the air. Heavy and stupid air. The red glass tore it apart.

Crash. The woman cried. The old me who was shining cried too. A red fluid was all over her dress. Stained it. I smiled. Suddenly.

Back to the fight. The old me who was choking me. I pushed her off. She couldn't anymore. Had lost her strength. I pushed her harder. Got up. Triumphed. He was still there.

He had changed. I felt weak again. The old me too. I fell. The rusty floor was hard. He smiled. Walked right past us. Shed his skin. He wasn't a friend. An enemy. With wings. I'd been helping a...


	23. Outer

A god. He was a god. I'd been helping him all along. I'd been helping a god. I was back in the big room. They were all staring. He came out of the shiny old me. She fell just like me. She fell and he spread out his wings.

Dark red. And black. His wings were huge. Hovering over the shiny old me. His horns. All of him. It reeked. He was the god from all the pictures. He'd kill us all. He had already slaughtered the girl. I knew it was him. It had to be.

The man ran. He wasn't a fighter. And he didn't want to die. I didn't care. I envied the woman as the god killed her. She smiled. Smiled as she dropped dead. Killed by lightning.

Left were only the girl's dad and the god. And a wheelchair. Something strange about it. Didn't want to remember.

They fought. The girl's dad didn't run away. He shot the god. The god shot the girl's dad. Lightning and bullets. Endless fighting.

Someone. Something. Inside the girl's dad. Helping. Something took all the hits. The god didn't hurt him. Not for real. Tiresome. Sleepy.

Darkness. And silence. I woke up again when it screamed. Freezing scream. Deafening. Then it fell. The god fell. Died. The girl's dad killed the god.

Relief. The god. It had cheated all along. And now it was dead. It was gone.

The girl's dad. He ran to the fallen old me. Couldn't hear what they said. Everything faded slowly. Everything ended. The shiny old me held out her arms. Gave him something. I wanted. I had to see what it was.

Lacking strength. Dying. Couldn't get up. Couldn't move. The girl's dad took it in his arms. Held it tightly. To his heart. A child?

The shiny old me. She pointed. It rained fire. She pointed, it rained, and he ran. Ran away with the child. The man was there too. But he couldn't run.

The nurse. The one the girl drew. She took the man. Dragged him away. Only the girl's dad and the child escaped. Now we were truly alone. She stopped shining. Slowly. Faded away.

I was lying on my back. Cold. It was cold. Really much. The stars above went out one by one. I reached out for them. For the heavens. For the people above me. For life. Happiness. Anything I could reach. I'd take anything.

There was nothing. My hand returned empty. No hope. And no fear. Everything had slowed down. Slug speed. Waiting. I had reached nothing. A little bit of happiness. The girl.

Somehow I could still feel. Feel tears run down my face. Wetting everything. I was supposed to watch her. Take care of her. Be her mother. No. Sister. Friend. It didn't work.

I was hoping. Maybe. Maybe I'd see her again. Waiting for the kiss. The sweet kiss of death. Memories flashed by. I'd rather they'd leave me alone.

Not all of it was sad. But nothing was happy. My sister. We played together. But when I was alone I always drew the same things. The dogs. The dinosaurs with wings. Adults. Worse things.

In school. Blank. I only remembered the girl's toilet. Crying. All the time. The others hated me. They had knives. Wrote things on my table.

Lighthouse. So short. Standing at the edge. Couldn't jump. Couldn't let go.

The hallway in the house. The stairs. My room. Butterflies. Dinosaurs. Books. Drawings everywhere.

The house. Tied up. They're walking around me. Heat. Flames. I scream. My clothes. On fire. I'm burning.

Below it all. They wrapped me up. Never spoke to me. Left me alone. Watching. They hated me. Everyone did. And they wouldn't let me die. I couldn't die.

A road. Night. Chilling breeze. Protective uniform. A car's coming. It's evading. Falling off the road.

I reached out again, but there was nothing. There never was.


	24. Heaven

Distant talking. Mumbling really. Couldn't hear what it was. Or who. Even now. They wouldn't let me.

Shaking. Mouth to my lips. Warm air. Almost familiar smell. I coughed. I wanted to die. Didn't respond. Another faint touch. Elsewhere.

It kept on. For the longest time. The coldness went away. Just slowly. Warm. Hot really. Filling me up. Maybe it wasn't my time yet.

I couldn't relax. Too much tension. Started shaking. Feeling really weird. Wanted to talk. No words came out. Couldn't focus. Paralyzed. But not really.

Much too warm. Much too low. My eyes flung open. It was her. It was the girl. Her face was wet from tears, but she was there. I wanted to hug her. Hold her. I wanted it all. I smiled and cried. We were the only people in the world.

I couldn't hug her. Couldn't tell her how happy I was. Right then it all faded. But in a good way. Almost sort of nice. I whimpered. Loudly. Shook all over.

She let go of me. Laughed and cried some more. Hugged me. Tightly. Like she would never let go. Didn't want her to either. I wrapped my arms around her. Kissed her nose. Thanked her for saving me. Thanked her some more.

We talked. About what to do. And stuff. Couldn't decide anything. We were all alone with no one to ask. All alone together. I wondered if there ever was a real world with other people. Didn't mind if there wasn't. The girl agreed. She said her dad would do fine without her.

We rolled over. Our noses touched. Eyes met. Her pretty brown eyes. They were all I ever needed to see. We just stared forever. She chuckled. I laughed. Wrapped my arms around her. Held her.

She did the same to me. Her arms around my neck. Our dresses. Such a nice scent. Her hand too. Although the smell was different. Weird. And her breath. So sweet. I inhaled it all. Wanted all of her.

This was heaven. It had to be. Although something was missing. I wanted. I wanted something more. Comfortable. A real place. Not the rusty floor. But it was okay for now. We could find a home later. For now nothing else mattered.

Memory. So irritating and treacherous. But when I felt like I'd known her all my life. Then it all made sense. Destiny. This was meant to be. The sole purpose of my life was to find this girl. In a way I was happy with everything. When the end is good, all is well.

A cold breeze. She held me closer. To share the warmth. My tears. Mixed with hers. They had dried. Nothing to cry about. The wind kept blowing. The rusty fence. Aching. Slightly.

We got up together. Always together. Neither was leading. Just hand in hands. The road out of this place. This town. No need to stay. We could go anywhere.

Toward the door. The girl tried to open it. Stuck. I helped. But it wasn't enough. The door was shut. No way out?

Whispering. We spun around. It was him. He was there. The god. Lying still on the floor. The cold metal floor. He had lost the horns. And wings. I let go of her hand and walked closer toward him.

Dying. In a way it was sad, but I felt nothing. Perhaps. Maybe a little love. He had taken care of me. Awoken me. He had shown some affection. And he did save my life many times. Maybe he really did like me.

He stretched out his arm. Toward me. His lips moved. He wanted me. To join him. I held up my hand. Felt a little like doing it.


	25. Bloody Bows and Bloody Knees

No. He'd never be soft. Even if he promised. I felt the girl. Her fingers tracing. She was soft. I didn't need him. I didn't want to. Wouldn't listen to him anymore.

She gave me the knife. The cat and the snake. Two animals. Two adept predators. Each would have killed him. Each would have taken pleasure.

I clenched it. It would be such a relief. To get rid of him. That was what I wanted. Or used to want? I couldn't decide. I could stab myself too. Same thing. Wouldn't have to see him ever again. Maybe. If I could hit the heart.

The girl touched my shoulder. Feather light. No. I didn't have to. I wanted to live. And I wasn't a cat. Or a snake. Or heartless. I was the most loving and kind angel in the world. Beside the girl, of course.

Forgiveness. That's what it was. I put it back in the sheath. Waved goodbye. Turned away.

He whimpered. Passed away. And we walked away. The door opened. A red hallway. Everyone was there.

Brown thing. In the hallway. Whispering. Headless monster. The old me had killed it. The shadow. Thrown it against the fence. Kicked it over and over again. We didn't feel much. It was just a monster. We moved along in silence.

A bird. A flying dinosaur. A monster. It had attacked the girl. Hit her. Wanted to bite her to death. In the alley. I had killed it. Torn it apart. It was staring at me. Tears in its eyes. We had no regrets. We wandered in its blood. Feeling nothing.

A child. At the same age as the girl. Disfigured. Frozen in a silent shout. It attacked us when we painted the first sign. Caused so much pain. I had wished it dead. We regretted nothing. To move on.

On the floor was a headless dog. The missing head was next to it. It whimpered. Tearful eyes. It had attacked us. The girl had murdered it. With the knife. Decapitated it. We shed no tears. We ignored it.

Another flying monster in the hallway. I had sliced it in the belly. It was in the hallway. Its blood and guts were on the floor. It cried in pain. Cried over the wasted life. We felt no regret. We walked on.

The insect. The moth. It attacked her dad. She had defended him and squashed it. Taken its life with all the strength in the world and sent it into the abyss. Now it was flat on the floor in the hallway. Broken wings and limbs. Spilled poison. We felt nothing. We wandered on.

Adults. Fast. Always after me. They took up much space in the hallway. Bodies and sewn off limbs and blood. Parts everywhere. Cries for help. Help finding the missing parts. They wanted to kill us and I defended us. The knife had done it. Taken them all. We didn't feel sorry. We moved on.

A dog. Crushed to pieces. Ribs and teeth lay beside the broken corpse. It hadn't done anything. We killed it anyway. Somehow. I didn't know what to feel. So I looked at her. The girl was calm. She nodded and smiled. Contagious smile. Squeezed my hand. We walked on. No need to feel sorry. No need to blame. And it did attack us first. But no need to think about it. We were alive. And what else is there?

A huge dinosaur bird. Fluttering in the night. It had attacked the girl's dad. We had killed it. The strongest feeling ever. To be protective. Its dust were scattered in the hallway. Silent groaning. There was no regret at all. We walked on.

The woman. The enemy. We didn't know what she wanted. But she wasn't nice. She caught the old me. The shadow. She'd done something to the old me. And the god had murdered her. Her fried corpse was on the floor. Hit by a lightning. Stupid woman. We felt only joy. Joy and moving on.

The man. The nurse had killed him. The nurse the girl had drawn. He was unfriendly. He hurt us. A bad man. We didn't feel sorry at all. He deserved it. Or maybe he didn't. We passed by his dead body.

There was no more death. Not now at least. There probably would be. Again some day. We walked out the door. Out of the world. Away from the mist and snow and unfriendliness. The door shut behind us. Disappeared.

People. They were walking around. Doing things. Things normal people do. Walking around their houses. In and out. The stupid mist was gone. And the snow. And the darkness. And the monsters. I didn't want to talk to any of the people though. Too scared. Too scary. Shy.

The girl and I were covered in blood. The dresses had gotten dirty. For once. All the things we murdered. The stench. Horrible. We couldn't get past the people in the town like this. Not like this.

There was dirt in a fore garden. She lied down in it. Started rolling around. I chuckled. Joined her. I hadn't done something like that for too long. We kept rolling around in the soil. Until we were all covered. The blood went off. Mostly. Now it was just dirt. Her rosy cheeks were all brown. My dress not at all blue.

Like that. We went on. Down the road. People stared. Pointed at us. Maybe they hadn't seen someone like us before. So dirty. A little exciting. In a way.

A small group of people. Standing on the sidewalk. Talking. Slight fear. Maybe they'd turn and look at us. The girl shivered too. Scared. I clenched her hand.

Hey, look at those two. They're all filthy. They whispered things. I couldn't hear what it was. But they probably thought we looked stupid. We walked closer. And closer.

There was no way out now. The first one turned around. They started looking. This was the worst time ever. Worst thing ever. No way out. The world was closing in. Attack. Somehow. Sweating. The dirty sweat. The girl stopped. I wanted to keep moving. What was she doing? They were looking. They were talking about us. Thinking things. The girl. She.


	26. Red Bows

She had... no. We had stopped. Right in the middle of the crowd. She looked at me. Troubled. And maybe determined. There was something. Something. Groundbreaking. Perhaps.

Reaching out. She untied and tied my bow. The red bow. I did the same to her. Tied it properly. While they were all watching. She wiped my mouth with her hand. And I wiped hers.

Then she leaned in. Well, up mostly. I was the tallest. I bent down just a bit. So she could reach. Her arms around my neck. Brown eyes. Wasn't feeling nervous anymore. She shut them. Those pretty eyes.

I put my arms around her neck too when we started kissing. Shut my eyes. Shut it all out. All except for her. I knew they were all watching. Talking about how stupid we were. But I felt nothing but her. The girl. Her lips. She took my breath away.

So nice. I'd never kissed anyone before. It was soft. And warming in a way. And wet. She tasted like soil. A little sweet too, but mostly like dirt. I smiled. While kissing. It was funny.

When we opened our eyes. Nobody said a thing. Some were looking away. Some were staring awkwardly. A boy and a girl were smiling. A man blinked.

I took the girl's hand. And walked away. Hand in hand. The knife in the sheath on her leg. The magic uniforms and shoes. Nothing in the world could ever touch us. We were free.

Up and down streets. Nothing looked familiar. But we knew the way. A little house. Out in the wood. Far away from everything. Cottage made of wood.

There was a stone tablet next to the door. I took the knife and wrote her name in it. The right side. Then I gave the knife to her. She wrote my name on the left side. And she drew a heart around the names. And a plus. Right between the names.

This would do. No reason to stay outside. The door was unlocked. We walked inside. Shut the door. Turned the lock. Exploration. Slight thrill. Gave her hand an extra squeeze.

Living room. Where we'd be living. Walls, ceiling, and floor made of wood. A bed. Table with two chairs. A closet with food. Friendly smell. Like bread in the oven. And an oven. And a fireplace too.

A garden. Circular. The greenest grass in the universe. Surrounded by a tall hedge. We could see to the heavens. Night would fall soon. Back inside the house.

The last room. Marble walls. A marble room. Shower and bathtub. Toilet and sink. Only one thing was missing. A mirror. It didn't seem to bother the girl. But I was a bit sad. I really wanted to see myself. Especially now.

On the floor was something wonderful. It made me forget the missing mirror. Clothes. For both of us. Not dresses. The girl turned on the shower. The new clothes could wait.

Fully dressed. Into the water. Dirt and blood came off slowly. She removed the sheath. Washed the knife too. Until it was as good as new. I took the scrunchie from my wrist and wrapped it around the knife handle. Put the sheath and the knife and the scrunchie on the floor.

Dress came off. Dress shirt too. Red bow. Black shoes. White socks. Panties. Rubbing it all against the floor. The colors returned. The scent didn't. It didn't smell like blood, but the aroma from before was gone. Sad really. Maybe it'd return some day. When we'd need it.

The girl yawned. One. Two. Three. Four. Four seconds and I yawned too. Contagious yawning. Tired. I had to sleep soon. We washed each other's hair. Dried ourselves. And then to the bed. The clothes and the food and the garden could wait until tomorrow.

The mattress was soft, but not too much. It was a nice bed. One and a half person size. The blanket was deep sky blue with white clouds. The heaven. Somehow. A bit of it was here. The sky high above. In the bed.

I lied down. Took the pillow and placed it in the other end. Better that way. The girl went to the bathroom, but returned shortly. She had the ribbons in her hand. Lied down in next to me and took my right hand.

She tied the silk ribbon. Nicely around my wrist. Several times and with a small bow to seal it. I giggled. And she smiled. And handed me the other ribbon.

The girl held up her hand. I took her arm. Gave her raspberry. More giggling. It wasn't supposed to be the same. So I tied it around her ankle instead. Ended with a fine bow. Like a wrapped up gift.

She flicked off the light. Joined me under the sky blue duvet. Whispered goodnight and wrapped her arms around me. I hugged her too. Grinded our noses together. Kissed her mouth briefly.

I told her she tasted better now. She laughed. Kissed me. Licked my lips. The girl said the same thing to me. So nice. Her soft body. Like a warm cat. Just bigger and better. Her feet and knees were a bit cold. Mine too. I closed my eyes. And slept.


	27. Bare Knees

The girl was still sleeping. Ever so peaceful. She had probably forgotten it all. Dreaming sweetly. I let go of her and removed her arms. She didn't have to get up now. It was just me.

The wooden floor was nice. No splinters at all. And it was warm. I noticed the fire burning in the fireplace. Cozy. No need to put on clothes.

No mirrors in the living room. I hadn't seen any the night before. But better safe than sorry. I really wanted to see myself. Had wanted it for so long. Had to know what I looked like. But there was nothing in the living room.

Dawn was yet to come. The garden was dark. The hedges tall. No mirrors at all. And why would they be there anyway? No one has mirrors in the garden. Not even in a strange house like this.

I walked back inside. Into the bathroom. The magic dresses were dry. And soft. But the smell was still gone. I folded them. Nicely. Took shoes and socks and the rest. There were two hangers on the rack. By the front door that was locked.

The girl's uniform fit on one. And mine on the other. I went back to the bathroom and found the knife. Put it in the sheath. And strapped the sheath to the top of her hanger. In case we'd ever need it. Maybe one day. But a day far from now.

The marble bathroom. Our new clothes were on the floor. Warm floor. I didn't pick it up. It could wait. Searched the bathroom instead.

But there was nothing. No mirror at all. Not even a tiny one. Depressing. Had to pee. I sat down on the toilet seat. Couldn't remember when the last time was. But then again I hadn't eaten for so long. Or drunken anything. Maybe it all came out as sweat.

I dried myself and flushed. Washed my hands. That's when it hit me. I put the plug in the sink. And turned on the water. Slowly the sink was filled with water. Water that was filled with hope. My hope.

The light from the ceiling. It wasn't enough. I stared into the water. Something dark. A silhouette. There was nothing more than that. I couldn't see anything. Not even my eyes. Splash. Tears. Ripples in the water.

I sat down on the toilet again. Sat down and cried. I had so much. No one was bothering us. The girl was with me. But I only wanted to see myself. Even now. It was like they said. So many years ago. That I would never be happy.

Everything was sad. Nothing was right. Nothing ever was. Always a splinter. Always something bothering. It would never leave me alone. Wailing. Louder. Till I got all wet. Whimpered. It was just like back then.

Arms were wrapped around me. I felt her shoulder. Leaned my head on it. Cried. And I could hear something. The girl. She was crying too. For a while.

She wanted to ask me. I could feel it. She wanted to know. Now that we were safe. I let go of her. Looked her in the eyes. Wiped away her tears. I had stopped crying. We both had.

The girl didn't say a word. But I knew what she would have said. And I just looked. Her eyes. Her face. There was something about it all. Familiar in a way. She wasn't me, but...

There were no mirrors in this house. So I could never see myself. But maybe. Her face. Her beautiful face. Her hair. Nose. Eyes. Mouth. Cheeks. Ears. More even. The way she looked at me when she looked at me. I ran my fingers through her pretty brown hair.

Like lightning. It just hit me. I didn't have to see myself. There was no point. That's why I had to protect her. Because she was it. I could just look at her. That's the way I looked. Felt. We were the same. We were one. I cried and she cried and she smiled and I smiled and we laughed and giggled and killed a dog and painted things and lay in the grass. All together. This wasn't like me and him. The girl was exactly like me. And nobody in the world would bother us.

No reason at all. We didn't have to cry. I got up. Took her up in my arms. She smiled. Contagious. We smiled. And laughed. I carried her back to bed. Put her down just nicely. Caressed her soft arms. Lied down on top of her. Pulled the blue duvet over us. The fireplace burned still. And we kissed some more. This was love.


End file.
